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End Emotional Eating: Using Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills to Cope with Difficult Emotions and Develop a Healthy Relationship to Food
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If you eat to help manage your emotions, you may have discovered that it doesn’t work. Once you’re done eating, you might even feel worse. Eating can all too easily become a strategy for coping with depression, anxiety, boredom, stress, and anger, and a reliable reward when it’s time to celebrate.
If you are ready to experience emotions without consuming them or being consumed by them, the mindfulness, acceptance, and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) skills in End Emotional Eating can help. This book does not focus on what or how to eat—rather, these scientifically supported skills will teach you how to manage emotions and urges gracefully, live in the present moment, learn from your feelings, and cope with distress skillfully.
- Sales Rank: #57590 in Books
- Published on: 2012-07-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.25" h x 6.25" w x .75" l, .75 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 256 pages
Review
“End Emotional Eating may be the beginning for you in a new relationship with food and your feelings. Who hasn’t had a craving for food that came from a sense of emptiness, anxiety, or anger? This book is filled with powerful metaphors, empowering messages, and mental and emotional exercises that will keep you from eating away at your feelings. Accessible, intelligent, and compassionate, this book can help you find a new way of experiencing and using emotions. You will find wisdom that you can use every day. I highly recommend this book.”
—Robert L. Leahy, PhD, founder and director of the American Institute for Cognitive Therapy, professor at Weill Cornell Medical College and NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, and past president of the Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies.
“If you struggle with emotional eating and want to end the battle, this is the place to start. Based on solid scientific evidence, the author offers carefully selected, elegantly described, bite-sized techniques to release oneself from every aspect of the emotional eating cycle. The author did the work for us in this impressive, comprehensive work, and now we just need to begin. I highly recommend this book to anyone who seeks freedom from unhealthy eating habits and those who care for them.”
—Christopher Germer, PhD, author of The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion and clinical instructor at Harvard Medical School
“It’s a pleasure to see a book with a genuinely new perspective to offer the countless individuals who struggle and suffer over the simple daily act of eating. Well-grounded in scientific research, yet also written in a lively, accessible manner with moving personal stories and plenty of specific, explicit, practical advice, Jennifer L. Taitz offers plenty of new food for thought about food. This will be a helpful and valuable read for anyone who has let his or her eating be guided more by emotion than nutrition.”
—Roy F. Baumeister, PhD, author of Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength
“I have spent my entire career educating people about what to eat to maintain a healthy weight. But if there is one thing I have learned, it is that most people who struggle with their weight are not simply hungrier than their thinner peers. They eat for reasons other than hunger: sadness, loneliness, anger, and frustration. Emotional eating is often at the core of the poor choices people make when it comes to food. Jennifer L. Taitz has made a major contribution to helping those who suffer from emotional eating. She identifies the basic emotions that give rise to unhealthy eating habits and offers readers the skills and tools to end emotional eating once and for all.”
—Tanya Zuckerbrot, MS, RD, founder of F-Factor and author of The F-Factor Diet
“Why do we eat? Seems obvious, right? —Because we have to eat to stay alive! But many of us eat to feel better. We eat to push away feelings of anxiety, sadness, and self-loathing. Jennifer L. Taitz can help us stop. Her book, End Emotional Eating, helps us understand the link between emotions and eating. More importantly, it helps us break those links so that we have more healthy ways to regulate our emotions and so that our eating is not driven by our emotional state. The strategies taught in this book are innovative and powerful, and they have been shown to truly help people end emotional eating.”
—Susan Nolen-Hoeksema, PhD, professor of psychology at Yale University and author of Women Who Think Too Much and Eating, Drinking, Overthinking
“Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) is an effective treatment for a variety of psychological disorders. Never before has the wisdom of DBT, as it applies to emotional eating, been so clearly articulated. Authored by a master clinician and talented writer, this book artfully describes how to transform your relationship with food and life. I highly recommend that you read this book if you want to gain a new perspective on your emotional reactions and change the way you think about and respond to impulses to eat. This is not a diet book; it is a book that will provide nourishment for your soul and psyche. A genuine treat!”
—Dennis Greenberger, PhD, director of the Anxiety and Depression Center in Newport Beach, CA, and coauthor of Mind Over Mood
“Jennifer L. Taitz’s insight, compassion, and far-reaching clinical experience shine from every page.”
—Sharon Salzberg, author of Real Happiness: The Power of Meditation
“This is not a weight loss book. It is something much, much better. If you have tried over and over to control your weight and your eating, maybe it is time to let go of that agenda. This is a book about changing your fundamental relationship with food and eating, and importantly, your relationship to yourself! Imagine that you could come into a gentler, more compassionate relationship with yourself and with eating. If you want to explore a kinder approach, this is the book for you.”
—Kelly G. Wilson, PhD, cofounder of acceptance and commitment therapy and associate professor at the University of Mississippi
“Highly recommended. End Emotional Eating provides a sensitive and thoughtful account of how emotions and eating become entangled in a multitude of unhelpful ways, together with clear guidance for unraveling them and moving forward using a blend of ancient and modern approaches."
—Christopher G. Fairburn, MD, professor of psychiatry at the University of Oxford and author of Overcoming Binge Eating
About the Author
Jennifer L. Taitz, PsyD, is a clinical psychologist and director of the dialectical behavior therapy program at the American Institute for Cognitive Therapy in New York, NY. She is a certified diplomate of the Academy of Cognitive Therapy and is a founding board member of the New York City Association for Contextual Behavior Science. Her expertise lies in emphasizing simultaneous acceptance and change and providing tangible tools to help people get “unstuck” so they are better able to regulate their emotions. She has presented at conferences internationally on mindfulness and acceptance. Visit her online at drjennytaitz.com.
Foreword writer Debra L. Safer, MD, is codirector of the Stanford Adult Eating and Weight Disorders Clinic and coauthor of Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Binge Eating and Bulimia. Her clinical interests include working with patients who struggle with eating disorders and obesity, designing interventions for post-bariatric surgery patients, and using computer-assisted therapies to increase the dissemination of evidence-based treatments for eating disorders.
Most helpful customer reviews
38 of 38 people found the following review helpful.
Scientific, relatable, and practical
By Sarah
I’ve read a lot of books about healthy eating and mood disorder therapy, not to mention seeing professionals on the subjects, and I have to say End Emotional Eating is one of the best books I know. I find it scientific, relatable, and practical.
That said, it’s harder than it sounds to “sit with” emotions without letting it turn into feelings of deprivation. This is something I’m still practicing, so I’ve summarized the key points below to remind myself (and you, if you’re interested) most especially in those times of weakness what I can do to truly have a positive relationship with food and why it’s best for living a life I value.
Concept
Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) is based on accepting reality because suffering comes from trying to fight pain. Radical acceptance is an active process of “purposely adopting an open, nonjudgmental receptive stance” while at the same time deciding whether or not to change the way you respond, often choosing to accept commitments required to take action in order to live life fully.
It is illusory correlation to believe an increased urge to binge means an increased need for it. In fact, urges come and go, whereas “the more we indulge in a habit, the more habitual it becomes.” Giving into emotional eating takes away opportunities to develop other coping skills making you believe it is the only way to cope.
Thinking about food may be less painful than some emotions, but emotional eaters then develop pain and suffering around food. Emotional eaters tend to be more sensitive to rewards as demonstrated in caudate nucleus response research. In fact, motivation is fleeting and unnecessary. “Action leads to action.”
Recommendations
“Accept life as it is without indulging or controlling.” Pain can be “something you experience in the service of living according to your values.” Being mindful of this can foster self-compassion and empathy with others. Self-compassion involves kindness and warmth while maintaining realistically high standards.
Focus on changing behaviour rather than trying to control feelings. “You don’t have to feel willing to behave willingly.” Master mental aikido by weaving and surfing, not throwing punches. Be in the present, aware of the full experience, and problem solve. “Look at the thoughts rather than from the thoughts.”
Strategies
Distress tolerance refers to “both your perception of your ability to sit with physical or emotional pain and also the behaviour of tolerating difficult feelings.” Hold stories about your abilities lightly. Avoid trying to control foods or experiences.
Self-soothe mindfully without food if you need to restore your energy and mind state for problem solving. Build a reservoir of options for all your senses like a scented washcloth, avoiding those that may exacerbate pain like sad music. Take care of yourself by holding yourself accountable, keeping soothing from becoming avoidance.
Urge surfing describes “a technique to observe the rise and fall of a craving … skilled surfers ride above waves and maintain balance in every circumstance … dancing on water.” To surf urges:
1. Slow down your mind and body.
2. Let go. Nonjudgmentally observe the urge. Consider your senses, thoughts, and urges.
3. Refocus. Notice your surroundings, your feelings, and how consequences relate to what you really value.
4. Choose. Where is the urge now? Are you willing to watch it rise? Can you practice letting the discomfort exists for just a little while longer than you might otherwise, before you give in to it?
Mastery is about “purposely scheduling activities that engender a sense of confidence” improving overall belief in the process of improvement and one’s abilities. Identify realistic goals and regularly challenge yourself. Focus on mastery in different areas for the sake of mastery rather than trying to control feelings.
To address judgment, create two pie charts. One represents relative importance of main areas of your life most important to you now. The second represents what you would like to matter in how you aspire to live your life. Consider the following common values and really “taste” them: family, partner, friends, work, education, fun, spirituality, community life, physical self-care, environment, and beauty. Notice how overvaluing eating and appearance can lead to undervaluing other areas of your life and more vulnerable dependent on one area more than a variety of factors.
Virtues describe “a set of moral standards that can guide us in how we implement our values,” giving our values-based actions detail. “When we focus on values, we let go of measurements and focus on living with virtue.” Living according to values during tough times requires devotion and skill. Practice skills in advance by imagining yourself executing the behaviour in certain situations, reflecting on thoughts and feelings. Make detailed plans.
Although this summary covers all the information I deem key, there is obviously more detail on what, how, and why to end emotional eating in the book, including additional tools like accessing wise mind and acting opposite. I highly recommend this book!
21 of 21 people found the following review helpful.
End Emotional Eating
By Booger99
I have read many books on binge eating but none have given me hope as much as Dr Taitz' End Emotional Eating.
It is very intelligent book yet easy to read and understand. I especially liked the idea of sitting with your urge and "surfing" through it. She emphasizes that feelings and urges come and go and we can learn to ride the waves of the urges till they past.
The main message is accepting your feelings and your-self; also being as compassionate with yourself as you'd be with others. We binge eaters are very hard on ourselves and in this book you will learn to be patient and understanding with yourself, We don't have to eat our feelings away there is a way out and this book will help show you the way. I am a 62 year old male and I have binged all my life but now I feel great hope that help has finally arrived.
I also like when Dr Taitz asked if you made a life pie-chart how much of it would be taken up by your concern and worry over eating and its pain I was stunned to realize it would take up at least 90% of mine.
25 of 27 people found the following review helpful.
the REAL key to weight loss
By DoctorLA
This is NOT another diet book. This is the secret to maintaining weight without dieting and keeping the weight off. Why didn't somebody come up with this sooner! The root of the diet issue is managing emotions and this teaches you to do just that. As a physician, I'm delighted to see this available.
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